My brother Nate asked me if I had already written my final post. Of course not, it has to be organic when I complete my list. The truth is, I have written this blog over and over in my mind and find it rather daunting to put into words. Tomorrow I turn 30. I walked in the door this evening after completing my last 30B430 task, and Chris was standing in the kitchen with a glass of red wine. “Happy last night of your twenties,” he said with an adorable 8 year old boy smile. All I could do was laugh. Why have I made turning 30 such a big deal? Is it a big deal? I love making birthdays important. Not just mine, but my family’s, boyfriend’s and friend’s birthdays. It is the one day a year when you can celebrate your birth. Your existence on this earth. You are a year older and a year wiser. On the other hand, why not celebrate every day we are alive, by not sweating the small stuff (thanks Dad) and enjoying every moment. Take the time to find mini celebrations, salvations and meditations. I feel like turning 30 is the end of an era and the beginning of something great. I learned so much in my twenties. How to deal with heart break. How to not mix liquor on New Year’s Eve. How to fill out paperwork and that having health insurance is a key component when searching for a job. That I am finally at the age where I say to younger girl friends, “When I was your age,” or “You are too young to remember that,” and remember when that was said to me. That it will always be ok to call Mom and ask for help and that having a few great friends is different then having many rainy day friends. I discovered Casi and a me I like to be even though some days I don’t feel quite right in my own skin - and that is ok. I found out what depression was and how to battle it while going through the deep loss of a parent. I moved to a new state into a new theatre community and found the man I want to spend the rest of my life with. I made many mistakes and learned how to learn from those mistakes. I have so many memories of grand adventures and hours of laughter. I do believe everything happens for a reason and have enjoyed finding my own path. I think I was afraid to turn 30 because of the stigma behind getting old. I would no longer be desirable. Bull. I would stop having fun. Bull. I am a loser because I have not accomplished the same things that other people my age have accomplished. DUH. I am on a different path and I am proud of everything I have accomplished. Each year brings me a confidence I have never had before and this 30B430 list is a celebration of self care. It made turning 30 fun.
Of course I have already started on my 40Before40 list and it will be posted soon. Dont’ worry. One of the treasures of this blog is how I have inspired others. The community that formed around me. I have had many friends create their own list and random people who hear about it that are excited. I see a spark ignite and hope that it brings them some joy as they accomplish mini goals while practicing self care. People like to celebrate triumphs and my list became their triumphs as well. Friends and strangers (CPR guy who discounted my class for example), got to be a part of the magic in crossing something off my list. It helped me make new friends, (like when I met my best friend’s boyfriend and he wowed me with helping me accomplish the whiskey tasting). I got to catch up with old friends, (like when Amanda who I hadn’t seen in years and I got to adventure to find Antarctica soda). AND of course I got to experience yet another fun adventure with a bff Brandon as we polar plunged into the winter lake as my first accomplishment on my list.
A favorite quote I had as a high school student was, “Every great accomplishment was once considered impossible.” Everything on your bucket list is undone until you go out and do it. Have an adventure. Make a memory. I am looking forward to the adventures my 30’s will bring and can’t wait to check each thing off of my 40Before40 list. Goodbye 20’s. You have been good to me. 30’s I am ready for you.
"All I need is a sparkler and a light." - Casi Maggio